EAΘ - Epsilon Alpha Theta

The prestigious nugget society of Shenandoah University

What's here: member list | memorable quotes | photos | guestbook

Your EAΘ Officers:

	Matt Berti founder and Dictator-for-Life		Larissa Critchfield VP of RINA (Vice President of Really Important Nugget Affairs)
	Jenna Warrenfeltz Chairmanus Nuggetus and reigning Nugget Queen		Andrew "Gourd" Greenwood Supreme Underlord of the Nugget Commonwealth

Important Dates

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Last day to order 2007 T-shirts.

FAQ

What is EAΘ?

Epsilon Alpha Theta is a fraternity at Shenandoah University in Winchester, VA. The premise of our fellowship and the justification of our superiority lies in the golden-fried chicken nugget: we love them and we can eat more of them than anybody.

What is the official nugget language and religion?

The official language of Epsilon Alpha Theta is Nuggets-stuffed-in-mouth English. The religion is, of course, Nuggetism, wherein we worship the glory and deliciousness of the Chicken Nugget. Prayers, worship, and adoration are sometimes directed toward He Who Fries Nuggets, Melvin. The Nugget Bible is our scripture, but its secret canonical revelation is only shared among members and it's full revalation has yet, in fact, to be revealed.

Membership is given by the mandate of an EAΘ officer. However, those select few chosen must prove themselves worthy by completing the Feat of Nugget Strength - the consumption of 40 chicken nuggets in one sitting. Sittings are performed in the Allen Dining Hall at Shenandoah University on a given Friday at 5:30 PM.

What are my responsibilities as a Nugget Brother or Sister?

Once a member of the fellowship, every facet of one's life is devoted to the wellbeing and advancement of the Nugget Commonwealth. This includes, but is not limited to: religion, monetary expenditures, social endeavors, and sexual preference. The Nugget Virtues are gluttony, impatience, lack of restraint, obesity, and loyalty to your brothers in Nugget.

What is the current World Nugget Record?

The current record is held by Bill - 104 nuggets consumed in one sitting. The record was formerly held by Travis with 102 nuggets, but was abolished on September 30, 2005.

Astounding Facts & Depraved Statistics

• Epsilon Alpha Theta members engorge 88.8886% of all nuggets consumed every friday in the cafeteria!
• An average of 1.5 nuggets are consumed by an Epsilon Alpha Theta member for every hour in every day of the week!
• If you lined up every nugget ever consumed by an Epsilon Alpha Theta member, it would make a really, really long line!
• The ideal N.G.F. (Nugget Grease Factor) is 4!
• The highest N.G.F. ever recorded was 14.5 on 21 October, 2005.
• The official colors of Epsilon Alpha Theta are barbeque red, honey mustard yellowish, and gold (representing the golden-fried nugget)!
• The 2004-2005 Ultimate Nugget Champion, Bill ate 3.3 pounds of nuggets in order to earn his title and the world record!
• Bill shat 5 times over the course of 3 days thereafter eating 3.3 pounds of nuggets on May 4, 2005!

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